NEARLY DEPARTED
Adventures in Loss, Cancer, and Other Inconveniences
A heartbreakingly hilarious memoir of losing both parents to cancer and making daring choices to avoid the same early demise.
By the time she was thirty, Gila Pfeffer was the oldest living member of her family. A blood test confirmed she carried the BRCA1 gene—which put her at high risk of developing breast cancer herself. Determined to break the cycle of early death in her family, Gila decides to undergo an elective double mastectomy.
This memoir follows her path as she becomes a reluctant expert on how to sit shiva, finds love, and becomes a mother,
A heartbreakingly hilarious memoir of losing both parents to cancer and making daring choices to avoid the same early demise.
By the time she was thirty, Gila Pfeffer was the oldest living member of her family. A blood test confirmed she carried the BRCA1 gene—which put her at high risk of developing breast cancer herself. Determined to break the cycle of early death in her family, Gila decides to undergo an elective double mastectomy.
This memoir follows her path as she becomes a reluctant expert on how to sit shiva, finds love, and becomes a mother, before her life is derailed yet again. Her preventative mastectomy reveals cancer already growing in one breast.
After enduring eight rounds of chemo and an oophorectomy, she takes her last-ever dip in the mikvah waters as a bald, menopausal, thirty-five-year-old mother of four. With chutzpah honed over years of repeatedly surviving the worst, she saves her own life.
- Experiment
- Hardcover
- July 2024
- 272 Pages
- 9781891011627
Buy the Book
$27.95
About Gila Pfeffer
Gila Pfeffer is an essayist and humorist. Her work has appeared in The New York Times, The New Yorker, McSweeney’s, Today.com, and Oprah Daily. Gila’s monthly “Feel It on the First” campaign uses humor to remind women to prioritize their breast health. She splits her time between NYC and London.
Praise
“A darkly funny memoir.” —katiecouric.com
“This is the perfect book for anyone seeking levity in the face of devastation. Gila’s life is a master class on perspective and how to handle some of life’s darkest moments with fortitude and, most importantly, humor.” —Iliza Shlesinger, award-winning comedian, actor, writer, producer, and author
“Few authors can move you to tears with their words—Gila is one of them. Reading this book, I felt like she was my best friend telling me her story” —Sarah Cooper, comedian and author of Foolish
“Pfeffer seamlessly blends tears and laughter in her vibrant debut memoir. . . The results are as funny as they are heartfelt and inspiring.” —Publishers Weekly
Discussion Questions
1. Gila lost both of her parents to cancer, making her the oldest living member of her family by the time she was thirty. How do you think this affected her motivations throughout her memoir?
2. Gila’s mother was resistant to getting a mastectomy when she was diagnosed with breast cancer. By contrast, Gila underwent a double mastectomy as a preventative measure. How does this illustrate Gila’s mission to “outsmart her genetic destiny”?
3. Gila includes nonnarrative elements—the presurgical intake form (page 127) and the customer satisfaction survey (page 249)—as part of her story. Did you enjoy these sections? How did they change your perspective on Gila’s story?
4. Throughout the book, Gila maintains her sense of humor, even in her darkest moments. Has humor helped you deal with tough moments in your own life?
5. Publishers Weekly has praised Gila for “seamlessly blending tears and laughter” in her memoir. What effect does the juxtaposition of humor and sadness have on the reading experience? Were there moments that made you laugh out loud or cry?
6. Gila’s Jewish faith is an important part of her life. What role do you think faith played in Gila’s breast cancer journey?
7. Gila was raising four children while undergoing treatment for breast cancer. How does she balance her health issues, both physical and mental, with parenting her children?
8. Much of the book revolves around Gila’s family—her parents, children, sisters, and husband. Discuss how Gila’s upbringing impacts how she raises her own children, and how her relationships with her sisters change after her parents’ deaths.
9. One of the main themes of Nearly Departed is learning about family medical history in order to overcome health issues. How does Gila advocate for preventative medicine throughout the book?
10. At the end of the book, Gila shares that her sisters were inspired by her experience to get tested for the BRCA1 gene. Were there particular moments when you felt inspired by Gila’s story?